Nacho Salad is the Answer

Casa de mi PadreWe have many first-world food epidemics in this country.

Long term, deep-reaching, polarizing problems regarding obesity, high fructose corn syrup, contaminated spinach and peanut butter have many widespread and controversial factors surrounding them, so I won’t waste my time blasting Mayor Bloomberg, advocating local product avocation, or encouraging you to find out where the hell your food comes from.

I’m talking about some low hanging fruit here: food waste.  Each year, about one third of the global food population (or 1.3 billion tons) of food is uneaten, thrown away, or discarded (screw you, moose poachers, that thing could feed a family for six months). Of course, on a macro scale, we as individuals can’t meaning impact production methods of the large companies who provide nourishment our growing population.  One step is to eat everything you buy or make, which should be pretty straightforward.  The Epic Meal Time men eat everything they create, so why can’t you?

Well, sometimes it’s hard to eat everything you purchase.  Ever have a ton of small pieces of tortilla chips left over in the bag that you can’t possibly use to scoop out dip? Ever get slimy remnants of salsa or queso on your knuckles from reaching into the jar? Yeah, it sucks. Modern technology can help with this problem, but implementation is far in the future.  So what can you do in the meantime? Make Nacho Salad.  Yes, the hybridization of Nachos and Taco Salad.

But let me explain: this is quite different than anything you’ve ordered at Taco Bell. No dumb flaky taco shell around your ugly lettuce strips, no solitary plain blue corn triangles to avoid.  Many folks think they are making Nacho Salad by just throwing whole chips into a salad, but they are sorely mistaken.  This concoction is to encourage FULL use of your tortilla chip bag, as well as avoid any knuckle sauce.  The texture difference and heat of the mixture is terrifyingly scrumptious, and demands to be eaten with a spoon. Here’s how you make it:

  • Last fifth of a bag of chips
  • Last third of various Mexican themed condiment jars (salsa, queso, etc.)
  • 3 dashes hot sauce
  • one dash chili powder
  • jalapenos/habaneros, sliced to your liking (optional)
  • 1 can re-fried beans, heated over stove (optional)
  • leftover meat/cheese/nacho-related products (optional)

If there are large chips left in the bag, take bag and punch it to pulverize remaining large chips. Dump contents of chip bag + nacho-related products in a medium serving bowl. Pour heated re-fried beans + remnants of Mexican themed condiment jars in the bowl. Top with jallies/habies + hot sauce + chili powder. Pop in the microwave for 44 seconds. Take out, stir, and repeat microwave cycle until heated through.

Make an dent in food waste and clean out your refrigerator/pantry by making Nacho Salad.  Your taste buds won’t regret it.

About: Esteban

Esteban is the Editor in Chief of RantingEsteban.com. Check out his page on Facebook, follow him on Twitter @RantingEsteban, or send him an email.

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