Las conquistas de Esteban

Cortés can suck it.

Like the glorious Spanish invaders of old, Esteban, while often outnumbered, subdues and eliminates entire civilizations with superior appetite, desire, determination, and smallpox.  Decedent of famed Conquistador Pedro “Red Sun” de Alvarado, Esteban takes no prisoners.  What follows is an ever growing list of some of Esteban’s conquests (ranked from “no sweat” to “I dare you”).


One Habanero Pepper, with lamb tacos
Blair’s Sudden Death Sauce
12 Blazing wings at Buffalo Wild Wings
Mad Dog’s Revenge Habanero & Chile Extract
Dried Naga Bhut Jolokia (a.k.a. Ghost Chile), chopped and soaked with Chicken Ramen
5 Cluck-U chicken wings, slathered in 911 sauce


Wendy’s Classic Triple
Pork Belly and Lamb Sausage with Roasted Pepper-Anchovy Goat Butter, Mustard Seed Gouda Cheese and Garlic Confit at Hot Dougs (a.k.a. the greatest thing I’ve ever eaten)
Barnyard Shiner at Kountry Kart Deli, Burlington, VT
Three Little Pigs Sandwich at Our House, Williston, VT
Traditional Sampler at Dinosaur Bar-B-Que x 4 Genesee Cream Ale


Death Wish Coffee
Night Train Express
Wild Irish Rose
Jeppson’s Malört

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